limericks summarizing a poem, and a movie

Someone rewrote some famous poems as limericks. Back in July, this inspired Metafilter posters to write more.

Here are a couple of stupid limericks from me.

a summary of a Shelley poem

Once only the Gods had fire (according to the ancient writers).
Then one of their bastards stole a couple of cigarette lighters.
He gave them to freezing cave men, then pathetic and weak.
For this the Gods nailed the bastard's guts to a barren peak.
But eventually they freed him, proving there is hope for us ordinary blighters.

A summary of a movie

Once there was a man with a Wookie
who only cared about money and nookie.
Then he met a rich girl named Leia,
and a kid who was destined to be a play-a.
The final action surely bankrupted the local bookie.

I told you they sucked.